The summer had come to an end again, and I found myself right back at square one as I did three years earlier. Over these past few years, my quest continued in finding us a new place to live, carefully weighing the advantages and disadvantages across roughly forty different urban areas amidst soaring property values nationwide. My inspiration was all but depleted. Once upon a time, this freedom felt more like a gift—I could
select the location where I wished to reside
— now seemed like a weight. Still, I couldn't surrender.
Similar to many adults, my place of residence was invariably linked to my workplace. Our initial apartment post-college was situated in the city where my spouse fortuitously found employment. For our subsequent move, it was another job opportunity that dictated the new location. That’s just how things went for us.
Then we both started
working remote
Five years back, everything shifted. Suddenly, it felt as though the gates of possibility had swung wide open. We were granted our wish to reside anywhere within our borders—any metropolis at our disposal—but now came the daunting task: deciding which one would be home.
Thus commenced a lengthy hunt for a place to reside—an excruciatingly difficult yet cheerfully hopeful journey in search of more than merely any metropolis, but specifically the ideal one.
perfect
city.
I can't be the only one who is fascinated by this. People searching for "
top city in the U.S.
have increased threefold over the last half-decade, coinciding with
the increase in individuals telecommuting
Furthermore, numerous yearly "best places to reside" rankings circulate online.
Livability
,
Money
,
Niche
and
Rocket Homes
Each recommends the top cities to call home, backed by reassuring data-driven analysis that I didn’t delve deeply into, choosing instead to browse through the enticing listicles filled with an impressive range of options. Covington, Kentucky. Boulder, Colorado. Madison, Wisconsin. They also offer tailored lists specifically designed for families (ask
Fortune
and recent graduates (
Forbes
I went through all of them with Type A zeal, convinced that the solution to my geographical conundrum was just a click away.
Ultimately, my desires were quite modest. All I sought was an affordable cost of living, a wide array of options, pleasant climate conditions, minimal criminal activity, numerous green spaces and cycling paths, robust employment prospects, enriching cultural experiences, and straightforward ways to travel to neighboring towns and nations. Quite logical really.
However, for three years, I didn't come across anything better than my current situation. We were stationed in Tampa, which frequently appears on various "top cities" rankings as part of a metropolitan area. Whenever someone questioned my desire to relocate, I found myself struggling to articulate my reasons. Yet, each moment I gazed out my living room window at those sun-baked palm trees devoid of foliage, it felt akin to residing within a faded snapshot from last year's summer getaway.
I could readily share with you numerous reasons why Tampa stands out as a fantastic place to reside. It boasts a lively culinary and art culture, lacks snowy winters, and imposes no state income tax.
Disney World
And beaches that won awards were essentially right outside your door. Everything seemed ideal, yet it still didn’t feel like home. Similar to being with someone who is intelligent and humorous and kind and all that, but just doesn’t seem quite right for you.
Every year, I vowed that this was going to be the year when we finally relocated. Every year, I extended our lease, reaffirming my commitment to finding the perfect place. I explored cities in Washington known for excellent hiking opportunities, yet found them beyond our financial reach. I also mulled over several locations in Indiana and Ohio due to their affordable lifestyles, but eventually dismissed the whole Midwest area—no offense to those who live there—as being too isolated for what we wanted.
We took trips twice to Tennessee and once to Georgia, went so far as flying into Oklahoma City, and made sure to visit each significant urban center in Florida with more than one hundred thousand inhabitants. None seemed right. At some point, I even thought about hiring a life coach to guide us through this decision-making process; however, the $6,000 fee proposed during a Zoom consultation almost sent me tumbling from my kitchen stool.
Last November, on a spontaneous impulse, we embarked on a short trip to Raleigh, North Carolina over a weekend. My objective was to pen down an article about attractions and activities around the city. The fall foliage reached its pinnacle during our visit—vivid shades of reds and golds that were uncommon where I lived, adding splashes of color across the parks and trails. During our exploration, we indulged in meals made from locally-sourced ingredients and strolled through the mild chill of early autumn, which hinted at the comfort only sweaters can provide. It felt like coming home; somehow, I sensed this would be my place. Consequently, we relocated to Raleigh earlier this year.
We adore it. Raleigh is the perfect fit for an American city, as described by a local with this apt phrase. It's neither overly large nor too compact. The climate is not excessively warm or chilly. Positioned midway between the mountains and the sea. Forward-thinking and varied, yet encircled by quaint villages and expansive fields. Naturally, every place has drawbacks—such as intense summertime moisture, tax rates surpassing those found in Florida, and personally, I wish those mountain cascades were within easier reach. However, when considering everything collectively, much like the storybook ending, it hits just the right spot.
I'd prefer to attribute our success to meticulous analysis. Of course, I did review the statistics: housing costs, mean temperatures, crime rates, along with the count of accessible international locations.
direct flights from the Raleigh-Durham airport
(nine, if you're curious). And indeed, Raleigh ranks sixth in the newly published list.
Best Places to Live
from U.S. News & World Report —
third last year
While I was still looking.
However, it isn’t about that. The thing I sought could never be quantified in a spreadsheet. It remains evasive but surprisingly concrete. Picture vast swaths of sunflowers under the summertime sky, a university known for crafting its own delectable ice creams, and the sight of browsing horses as you make your way along the road—despite being just fifteen minutes away from the city center. Imagine bidding farewell to those persistent palms and embracing instead the expansive shade cast by ancient oak trees, which earned this capital city its subtle moniker: the City of Oaks.
Maybe it isn’t flawless. But it’s exactly what we need at this moment, and that’s sufficient.
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